The loathly Laddie

In a chap like you it surprises me 

one person be so devoid of qualities

Did nature or nurture that make you this way

It’s impossible to definitively say

And hard as I try it is simply the case 

That positives in your favour I find little trace

Just how does a person become such a shit

There must be causal factors that lead to it

Maybe from the teat too early plucked away

& carry the trauma to this very day

Or dropped on your head and never the same

The nuerons messed up in your exceptional brain

Perhaps as a child you were often ignored

Or far worse still you were never adored

However it happened it’s plain to see

That you lack the basics of empathy

There are many loathsome aspects to you

But for now I shall share but a few

A more selfish fucker I’ve yet to meet

& let me tell you that’s quite a feat.

I’ve met people of every shape and hue

But rarely one quite as loathsome as you

For a chap with money you’re a penny pinching miser,

& that education you pursued has made you no wiser

You bring your own weather when you enter a room

kind of gloomy and grey and laden with doom

Your voice has the tones of an insistent drone

When in your company I wish I was alone

But hold fast! There’s one thing about you I like

The back of your head as you take to your bike

As a parting gift I leave you with this

Be it no more than a simple wish

All that you’ve given, let karma count

May you receive it back in equal amount

I’d like it best if we don’t meet again

So Iet’s just say Goodbye not Auf Wiedersehen

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